I just want to clear up some things,
i am very happy with where i am right now, and how I found this guy. I sent out some information that i shouldnt have released before. Getting to know Emmanuel was interesting, and the more I get to know him, I am realizing how happy i am, because of his unconditional love towards me, and i really want this. Instead of finding jeliousy i found unconditional love, I never knew what it was before, until I found it.
If I knew now what i knew then, I would have moved with him right away.
the reality is, I have to this live this out. I have to stay here.
That doesnt mean we wont see eachother, or WE (you, the one reading this) wont be together and have more pastimes in the future, but the most important thing i have to do right here right now is nourish myself from this love. i Need to focus on this,
I was unsure and unbalanced before when we were first meeting, and I had a hard time to say yes to what i was being offered and doing. I had to really think about it alot, and it really took me this to decide that i really love this guy. I wanted to find a person to spend my whole life with, and do everything and be exclusive, yes of course i want that, and now that it has come to me right now, i didnt think it would be here so quick. I guess i had to set in my mind that it would come way later when im ready to have kids and it would all coenside at the same time and be perfect. So me commiting to this took me some time in my own head to settle out, and what you heard of whats happening, was my mind in my deciding proccess i guess. me being unsure, and scared of course.. its all so new. its a new way of living,.giving up my old habbits, not having eyes for other people, but i am inlove and i am so exited. i cant wait for you to meet him, i know you will like him like everybody else does.